Oh, here comes Peter Cottontail…hopping down the bunny trail, giddy up, giddy up Easter’s on its way!
I really like jelly beans. But not just any jelly bean. They must be Brach’s classic. Brach’s beans are what I remember from my fat little child hands opening those plastic eggs. They’d come spilling out and I thought I’d hit pay dirt! I’d hide them from my sister. Or we would trade. My favorite? Orange. Then yellow. Then white. Then purple. I will just eat them and eat them until all I’m left with are those poor black ones. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BLACK ONES ANYWAY? You hear me, Brach’s? There is a disproportionate number of black ones. Who wants black eggs, anyway? Ok, well, my son for one. But I’m talking about the rest of us. I want more orange ones.
Easter is my favorite “Candy Season”. Yes. Candy season. Now that I’ve covered the jelly beans, let me just tell you about the heaven that is inside those bags of Fiesta Malted Milk Eggs, also by Brach’s. If you consider yourself a malted milk ball/egg aficionado like me, you should go get yourself a bag of them. Meijer has them but I no longer live near a Meijer, so I order them online every year (bless you, Amazon). A couple of years ago a dear friend sent me some even! That’s how good they are.
There’s another brand available with truly garish colors so saturated with deep hues you wonder if your fingers will turn, like when you eat Cheetos. Way back when, I had a job at a bank, so way back when that there were still drive thru’s and walk up windows open until 8 pm on a Friday night because those new fangled ATM’s weren’t available yet. My best friend from high school and I would work Friday nights together, as the low women on the totem pole, while all the senior (and mature) people went home. Well, Friday nights from 6:30-close would get slow. Really slow. But instead of polishing the counters and counting our money drawers so all the heads were facing the same way (and now when they don’t I get peeved! I thought it was “money law” in banks) we did what every normal college-aged gals would do. We would have a stash of our favorite candy that we would gorge ourselves on. So here we are, this one Friday night, with no cars visiting the drive thru, with our bag full of garish malted milk eggs. We (maybe it was “I”) licked them and then used them as lip gloss. That’s right, terrible and bright turquoise, green or the least offensive, pink lip stain. Yep, forget the “gloss” it was stain!
We were laughing our heads off with our funny looking lips for I don’t know how long, when I turned to the walk up window. There he was. A lone bank customer standing there with a very amused look on his face. I could have died if it was an option. My friend was mortified. We mustered our dignity (ha! We had so little to begin with) and waited on him…with our deeply stained lips.
I will never forget it. My sides hurt so bad from laughing with my friend afterward I thought I’d never recover. And I truly wish I had a picture to share. I’m sure we looked horrid.
Thankfully that customer seemed to have a sense of humor.